“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself. ”  – Steve Maraboli

I work full-time. I study full time. I mom full-time. I wifey full-time. I cook, I clean, I grocery shop, I wash laundry, I write essays, I take exams, I change diapers, I could go on forever with this list. The common theme in all of these activities is that they are usually, at least in part, for someone else.

My only part-time job is self-care. And by that I mean, self-care is the one activity I should probably do more of, but only make time for in the midst of all the other craziness. ‘Self-care’ is such a buzz word these days, on blogs, television, magazines. But in truth, most of us don’t know what self-care means, let alone practice it. I’m guilty of saying I need self-care, but never actually deciding what I want my self-care to look like.

On Monday, I took the day off.

Well, I decided that self-care means just that: I take care of myself and only myself at least for a short period of time. It means that I take care of my physical, mental, emotional, and social well-being. That can manifest itself in a one-time yoga session, a full spa day, or just reading a good book.

Y’all. I. Took. The. Day. OFF. Do you have any idea what this means? It means I took a step towards admitting that I am overwhelmed and overworked! And guess what I did? I grabbed a book and sat on my couch and I let my characters become my only concern.

I took my car for an oil change later in the day, and usually, I get impatient waiting for the mechanics to get done. Not today! I kept my nose in my book, and when Alan (the mechanic) handed me my keys, I decided that I was enjoying my me-time too much to go home. So, I took myself to lunch and I sat in a little booth all alone, reading. You know what I did next? I got up and got myself a pedicure. Can you believe? 

There is nothing better than knowing your value. Being a mother, a wife, a student, and all the other identities we encompass is important, yes. But the most valuable identity you have is your SELF. Take care of yourself, ladies. Stop making excuses for self-neglect. Instead, find reasons for self-care!

Self-Care (On a Budget) Tips:

• Read a good book
• Focus less on the cost, and more on the benefits: Remember, you are worth it!
• Spa Day at beauty schools: If you are brave enough to play trial subject for the students, oftentimes beauty schools can be a super cheap alternative to pricey salons and massage parlors! Look for one in your area. (Thank me later)
• Drop your kid(s) off at a good babysitter – Side Note: Moms need rest! People think that just because we have daycare during the weekdays, we are free. But the reality is, while our kids are at daycare, most of us are at work! Don’t feel ashamed of leaving your child to play with their dad or grandparents on a Saturday and taking some “me-time.”
• Skincare routine: Find one that works for you and use that time as an unplug from the world! Once a day or once a week – just fit it in there, sis.
• Shave! Let me first say, not every woman shaves and THAT’S OKAY! But for those who do occasionally, shaving regularly can actually be your me-time, and you’ll appreciate your smooth skin afterward. It’s the little things, ladies.