Self Care is Self Love

Self care is self love. Diari hates naps. Since she was little, she would come up with every excuse not to sleep. If only she knew how bad mommy wishes she could sleep anytime! But I know that she feels like she’s missing out on so much when she’s sleeping. So now we understand each other. Instead of calling it nap time, I just say “it’s gonna be quiet time” or “time for relaxing.” And whether she takes a book to bed or counts her fingers, as long as she lies down to rest, I’m happy.

Self care is an important part of self love. I’m grateful that we’ve all finally learned what that means in our generation. But unfortunately, most of us had to learn it in adulthood. My hope for these new babies is that self care because so normal for them that self love is all they know. The reality is, just being free to be a kid and have fun is a form of self care. We’re redefining self care to be every day acts of kindness toward ourselves that allow us to grow, breathe, and love.

Here’s some activities the girls have been doing to learn self care just in the past few weeks! What have you guys been doing at home?

1. Bathtub Fun

The girls already love bath time. I think most kids do. For parents, bath time usually means time to get them clean and ready for bed after a long day. But for them, it can be a fun activity that brings them peace. So recently we took it to the next level! Here are some tips to do that:

Tips

• Get kid-safe bathbombs and watch them fizzle together
• Let them pour their own bubble bath soap and watch the bubbles grow
• Throw some toys in the tub
• Get kid-sized bathrobes for after-shower fun
• Lather a ton of shea butter or their favorite lotion on their body. Pour some in their hand so they can put it on for themselves too.

2. Movie Night

Movies are a lot of fun for us. The girls are always excited when they hear about Frozen or Moana and they were starting to get to that age where they could enjoy the move theater. Now, even though we’re home, we make a point to watch all the new movies together right when they come out. We set everything up so it feels like we’re in the theater but from the comfort of our pajamas at home. Here are some ways I’ve made movie night fun.

Tips

• Snacks are a must! Forget about the sugar rushes and just let them have fun. Incorporate healthy snacks, but let them have at least one guilty pleasure. Diari loves picking her own snacks and Fatima just loves snacking!
• You can watch from your bedroom, your living room, or you can even get a projector to make a wide screen on a white wall!
• Turn off all the lights! Get a nightlight and dim the rest.
• Let them pick the movie too, give them options so they feel involved. Kids love having a sense of agency.

3. Arts and Crafts

Kids love to create and get messy. So let them. Give them a designated space to play with all of the things they can get on your walls. It will give them an opportunity to let out their creativity and it will actually give you either a moment to yourself or an opportunity to play with them.

Tips:

• Create a creativity space and make sure everyone knows that all crayons, markers, and crafts stay there unless we’re doing something different.
• Despite the creative space, make sure you change it up and let them get messy somewhere else every now and then. Sometimes, I put a big plastic sheet on the floor and let the girls do finger painting.
• Get coloring books of course, but find free coloring pages online.
• Get a variety of creativity tools.

4. Playing in Nature

Right now, we’ve had one of the biggest snow storms in a while. I felt cold and I had no desire to be outside. But the girls thought it was the coolest thing. So I got the idea to bring the fun inside. We collected a bunch of snow in a bucket and brought it up to the bathtub and I let the girls lean in and build little snowmen and just play until they were tired. The main takeaway is, you can make fun out of anything!

Tips:

• No matter the weather, think of fun activities you can create from it.
• If it’s snowing, get dressed really well and have a snowball party. Or bring the snow inside to help you stay warm.
• Take a walk together a few times a week.
• Let them play with mud! Some of my best memories were making mud pies outside.
• Get them paly clothes so that you’re not stressed about them getting dirty.

5. Spa Day 

As a mom, one of my favorite treat-myself things to do is a spa day. So I figured, why not do the same for my girls? I remember “being pampered” was almost taboo, a waste of money. But the peace and serenity that comes with it is priceless. And more importantly, you can do it at home! Here are some ways we pamper at home.

Tips:

• Bathrobes! Again, I can’t stress this enough, but kids-sized bathrobes make everything more fun!
• Pretty much anything you like during your spa day, you can find for kids. Yes, they make kids face masks and they smell like fruit!
• Bring books or other favorite activities to the party that help them relax.
• Play some soft music or have a dance party.
• Let them have a mini-therapy session. Ask them about some of their “kid” problems and really pay attention. This is a good time to just cut out all the noise and spend time together.